A land-based casinois the best place for gamblers to entertain themselves during theirleisure. When you visit a casino, you get more than just the thrillof gambling. You meet new people, share life experiences and listento amazing gambling jokes. The fun in a landbased casino is far morethan the fun you enjoy when you’re using an online casino exceptyou’re naturally an introvert. To enjoy your visit to the casino, youhave to contribute as much as you collect. So, don’t just listen toconversations, contribute and tell jokes too. If you don’t know anyinteresting gambling jokes, all you have to do is learn some. Thereare different types of gambling jokes. Some are for poker games, someare for card games, some are for slot machine games and some are forgambling in general. There are even gambling puns and wordplay thatwould blow your mind or the mind of players away.

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• Casino Gambling Puns

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Top 7 Best GamblingJokes

1. The Blonde WhoWon a Motorhome

Check out our collection of funny gambling jokes. We are sure they will make you laugh. If you have any gambling jokes as good, upload them at the bottom of this page. 1) I just bet £100 at the bookies that they would find Maddie, at 1000-1 odds. Puns are loved by everyone, read our collection of the best puns. Our website has over 300 funny, stupid, clever and interesting puns organised into categories. Select a category below or if you are feeling lucky generate a random pun! Gambling addiction puns funny gambling puns clever gambling puns casino gambling puns sports gambling puns good gambling puns horse gambling puns Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic.

One day, a blondelady walked into a restaurant to buy a cup of coffee. While drinkingthe coffee, she noticed a peel and win a sticker. As she peels itoff, she starts screaming “I have won a motor home” overand over again. One of the waitresses in the restaurant tells herit’s impossible for her to win a motorhome because the highest prizethey offer in the restaurant is a free plate of food for lunch. Theblonde lady insists that the prize on the sticker is a motorhomedespite what the waitress says. The noise attracts the manager whorepeats the same thing the waitress said. In a bid to convince themanager that what she won is a motor home, she hands the ticket overto the manager who takes one look at it and screams “W I N A BA”.

2. The Man WhoPlayed Poker With A Dog

This joke is about aman who goes into a bar and finds a dog playing poker. As soon as hesaw the dog, he was surprised and curious at the same time. Since healso wanted to play, he went to the table and sat down with otherplayers. All the players didn’t act funny like there was anythingunusual on the table. As the man sat down, the dealer shared the cardfor everyone on the table including the dog. The dog did everything ahuman would do when cards are dealt to them. The man could no longerkeep his curiosity to himself anymore so he said; “I can notbelieve that this dog is playing poker. He has to be the smartest dogin the entire world”. In response one of the players said; “heis not so smart, he wags his tail each time he is dealt a good hand”.

3. The Mom Who TriedTo Stop Her Son From Gambling

A mother who isworried about her son’s gambling habits goes to the headmaster of hisschool to complain about the issue. The mom tells the headmaster thatshe doesn’t know where her son got the gambling habit from but shewould love it if the headmaster can help with the issue. Theheadmaster agreed to help the boy. The following day, the headmastercalled the boy’s mother and told her that he has cured the boy’sgambling problem. When the mother asked him how the headmasterreplied; “He placed a $5 bet that my bead is false. I permittedhim to pull it to test his theory. After he pulled it and confirmedthat it was not artificial, he lost the bet and had to pay me the $5.I believe he has learned one or two lessons.” In response, themother said “No, he’s not going to learn any lesson. Yesterdayhe placed a $10 bet with me that you would give him permission topull your beard before the end of the week.”

4. Jack Gambles InVagas

During a weekendgetaway in Las Vegas, Jack lost all his money gambling. Things wereso bad that he had to borrow money from another player just to usethe toilet. However, when he got to the toilet, the stall was open sohe didn’t need to use the money for the toilet. He decided to use themoney the other player gave him to play a slot game instead of usingthe toilet. He won some cash. After winning, he took the money to theblackjack table were his luck increased and he won $5 million.Following his big break, he became a local celebrity who was invitedto give lectures from time to time. Each time he went for a lecture,he would talk about how he is looking forward to meeting the man whohelped him win his fortune. He said he intends to share his fortunewith the man. One faithful day, during the lecture, someone in theaudience stood up and said: “I am the one that gave you thecoin”. In reply, the man said “You are not the one I amlooking for. I am looking for the man that left the stall open.”

5. The Boy WhoSwallowed a Quarter

During a game in thecasino one faithful day, a man started screaming “My child ischoking! Help, he swallowed a quarter! Somebody, please help him! Asexpected, one of the players in the casino quickly offered to helpbecause he has ample experience with things like these. The manquietly put his arms around the boy’s tummy and squeezed until thequarter came out. After that, he walked quietly back to his seatwithout saying a word. The relieved and grateful father asked theman; “Thank you so much, are you a paramedic? In reply, the mansaid, “No, I am not, I work for the IRS”.

6. Should We Tip theDealer?

One day in a casino,a player who had a thirteen count hand was arguing with a blackjackdealer. The argument was about tipping. The dealer said it wasimportant for the players to tip the dealers whenever they are dealtgood cards. The player had the opposite opinion. He said that thedealer should not be tipped because they have no control over thecards that are given to the player, whether it is good or bad. Tocounter the payer, the dealer said “do you tip the waiter whenyou eat out? The player said yes. In response, the dealer said “Iserve you cards just like the waiter serves you food. So you have totip me too”. To wrap it up, the player said “okay, but thewaiter always gives me what I want. So, give me an eight.”

7. The Drunk BlondeWho Gambles Naked

One day, a drugblonde from Ireland walked into a casino and placed a bet of $20,000on a single game. Before the dice were rolled, she said to the otherplayers “I hope you guys don’t mind but I usually feel luckywhen I play completely naked”. Without waiting for anyone torespond, she strips naked and rolls the dice. While the dice arerolling, she screamed: “Oh baby, Mama needs some new clothes”.As soon as the dice stopped rolling, she screamed in excitementbecause she won. She hugged the dealers while she was still naked.After that, she wore her clothes, packed all her earnings and leftthe casino. When she stepped out, the dealers stared at each othercluelessly until one of them asked: “what exactly did she justroll?” Another dealer replied, “I have no idea, I thoughtyou were paying attention?”

These are just a fewof the most common gambling jokes. You can tap into your creativejuices and come up with great gambling jokes yourself. Don’t feel badif others don’t find your jokes funny. Just keep trying and you willget there eventually.

Casino & gambling riddles

Solving riddles can be as rewarding as a winning hand of blackjack with the basic strategy. We’ve decided to take a look at some of the most common riddles about gambling and casinos and detail the answers below. See if you can figure them out before reading the answers – then you can take them to the tables yourself and distract your fellow players as they try to crack them. Or check out the best online casinos for Australians.

The casino players

Riddle: There are four men who sit at a casino all night long and play until the crack of dawn. They are there for money instead of fun with a separate score for every one.

When it is time to square the accounts, they each make fair amounts. No one lost, and all gain – can you you explain?

Answer: Each man is a musician for the casino’s entertainment.

A mysterious gambling association

Riddle: A large group, each with a different face – regularly in smaller groups of four with identity as your case.

Sports Betting Puns

The first group will bring a desire of wealth – to steal though is tough and requires stealth.

The second group distract you and lead your mind astray, but don’t let this happen or your life will pay.

The third group can be utilised to take a life, without even using a gun or a knife.

The final group can be used to hide a man who just happened to have died.

Now if you were paying attention, what is this mysterious association we mentioned?

Answer: A pack of cards – each clue describes the four suits of a deck.

• First group – Diamonds, as they make you wealthy but are very hard to steal
• Second group – Hearts, as they can lead you astray
• Third group – Clubs, these are weapons which can be used to kill people
• Fourth group – Spades, which can be used to cover up a murder by burying a body

Gaming Pins Philippines

Heads or tails

Riddle: A gambler has three coins in his hand – the first is a regular coin, the second has two heads, and the third has two tails. The gambler picks a coin at random, flips it, and the result is heads.

What is the likelihood the other side is tails?

Answer: Since there are three heads and only one has a tails on the other side the likelihood is one in three – more of a mathematical problem than a riddle but fun to crack nevertheless.

First to gamble with dice

Riddle: Who were the first people to play with a pair or dice?

Solution: Adam and Eve in Pairadice.

A BlackJack

Riddle: A man visited a local land-based casino and on his first hand he managed to get a blackjack, while the next hand he lost. He then got another hand with a blackjack and the next hand he lost again. He ended up leaving the casino having lost every single hand and with no winnings at all – how is this possible?

Answer: The first hand featured a Jack of Spades and his third hand featured a Jack of Spades, both of which are black Jacks.

A classic riddle for a classic casino game

Riddle:

The game is nice if you see pictures thrice. It bears fruit of trees, sometimes in threes. It is just an arms length in front of you, what is the game?

Answer: A pokies machine.

A simple riddle but a risky wager

Riddle: What does this say? Or nothing. Or nothing

Answer: Double or nothing.

Casino Gambling Puns

Poker face

Riddle: What is the weakest hand in a game of Texas Hold’em, which you can have but still end on the river with a guarantee of victory?

Answer: Three Queens. For example, if you hold a Queen of Hearts and a Queen of Diamonds, and the board is showing Queen of Diamonds, Jack of Diamonds, seven of Clubs, four of Clubs, and two of Hearts, you can’t be beat. A straight or flush isn’t possible and no rank is higher than your Queens to allow someone to hold a better three of a kind.

The identical pokies

Riddle: A man owns a small casino with 50 pokies, each identical in appearance and the way they function. They all have the same return to player percentage. However, when the man goes to check the pokies at the end of the day there’s one machine which has 25% more in winnings than the others. What is different about this pokie compared to the others?

Answer: Nothing – it ultimately comes down to the human factor and that more people must be playing it and losing.